I'm on Your Team

Having been in your shoes, I deeply understand the challenge of attending IEP or 504 meetings and being both the parent and the advocate. I can personally attest to leaving every IEP meeting crying. And it was a struggle to hold the tears until I was walking out.

[Big sigh] I understand because I lived that for over a decade. But having spent so many years advocating for my child, combined with professional experience and then training to be an advocate, it’s really important to recognize the roles that each of us plays in achieving the desired outcome. When we take on too much, lines get blurred and then it’s difficult to drive clarity.

Me with my older son Benjamin and younger son Jason.

Many people notice that I am not a former school administrator. That is correct. For the families that chose to work with me, they need a fresh perspective. I realize there may be situations where a former school administrator can help. However, laws related to ADA or IDEA are public knowledge. And school districts post documentation about their special education programs. My approach is to focus on the art of the possible, not what we’ve done before. [A quote from Albert Einstein applies here…It’s about not finding a solution using the same brain that caused the problem.].

I think it’s important to understand that in an IEP or 504 meeting, each party has a specific role, particularly the parent. Your heart is connected to the special critter being discussed. And in these meetings, it seems that all we talk about is the deficiencies of our most prized possession. It’s brutal. [Another deep breath because I know].

It can be so intimidating for a parent to attend an IEP meeting when it feels like you against 8 different factions [school administration, special ed, general ed, SLP, school psychologist, office of special education, janitor, etc.]. Having an advocate should make it feel like: (1) there is an additional team member at the table focused on optimal outcomes, and (2) that additional team member is on your side. Two against 8 feels very different than the world against you. And no education advocate should contribute to adversarial or combative interactions with the people at school who work with your child on a day-to-day basis.

But…if we take a strategic approach and apply a collaborative methodology, then IEP meetings should not be painful. Much of the work to refine an IEP or 504 Plan can be done very civilly and effectively offline. So, ideally, IEPs or 504 meetings are procedural and memorialize an agreed path forward, not the next episode of WWE.

I am on your side. More importantly, I am on your child’s side. If I do my job skillfully, we can manage the IEP/504 process without conflict and without excessively billed hours. I take an outcomes-based approach which means we focus on measuring what matters while the school administrators propose actionable steps to deliver the outcomes needed for year-over-year educational advancement. What matters? Every child is different. That’s why we focus on the “I” in the IEP.

When does it make sense to have an advocate at an IEP meeting? That’s a great question. My recommendation is that it’s best to have IEP support during re-evaluations (which typically occur every 3 years or when something changes that substantially alters the plan moving forward), placement decisions, when it feels like mediation/due process is on the horizon, or when disciplinary or isolation events occur. Sadly, these are a reality, and I’ve been part of all of them. I really do get it.

My hope is to support you and your family through the process to avoid difficult events but, if these things do happen, I am ready to step in with a calm approach and help find a way for your child.

When I say support, I mean a few things. Stepping into an actionable role related to advocacy. I also mean supporting your life and how to handle the curve balls and still realize that there is joy in our lives as parents of children that do not fit the mold. I transitioned to this career so that I could be the resource I needed 15 years ago. I needed help with IEP navigation (i.e. an effective education advocate) but I also needed support in parenting a child with unique needs (i.e. life coaching).

It is truly my honor to walk this path with you.

--Amanda